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Tuesday, August 12, 2003

true to form

Sober month lasted a week.

You see, something weird happens when dealing with emotions; either you mask them or express them. Of course, being the macho, manly man that I am, I have no choice but to choose the former.

So, Texas Jerry and Dave, two people that I had the undeserving fortune to meet and befriend this summer also left me with the bitter sensation of knowing that within a few weeks they would be gone, back to Texas, true to form. So what do most guys do when they don't know how to manage their internal lamentations?

They get fucked up, and, true to form, I followed suit. I can't remember if I felt ashamed or proud or relieved when I gave Jerry two dollars to buy me a beer. Maybe I did it to commemorate their departure, or maybe I used their departure as an excuse to get fucked up. Regardless, I drank, and smoked. (the green)

I looked at Jessie with drunken eyeballs later on that night at Margo's afterhours party, "What ever happened to Sober Month?" she asked, and uselessy, just like i'm doing now, I tried to explain myself.

Maybe she understood.

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