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Wednesday, February 16, 2005

A Game of Cat and Hamster

I'm allergic to hamsters. They give me little bumps on the underside of my right wrist and make me sneeze, but I still like them because are small and furry and have pointy ears and tiny feet. When I heard that my girlfriend's hamster escaped from her cage a few days ago I was a bit alarmed. Now that it's still missing, I have a plan to try and capture it tonight.

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Vi walked in their room (yes they have their own room) a few days ago and found the cage door open. The more limber and agile of the two hamsters must have climbed up the cage and somehow managed to unlock and open the door leading out, because Vi is certain that she shut the door properly the night prior. The fatter hamster, Chubbs, looked up at her nonchalantly from inside the cage when she noticed the other one, Giz, missing. She seems to have bad luck with hamsters.

Concerned for the welfare of the hamster, Vi left a pile of food out the night the hamster escaped. It has consistently dwindled in quantity since then, meaning that either the hamster is still in the apartment and eating the food or that her roommate gets late night cravings for dried sunflower seeds and stale corn pellets every night.

I can imagine the wily rodent roaming about the apartment freely at night. I have dreams of her on the couch flipping through channels and then hitting the fridge for a snack, some chocolate chunk ice cream maybe. Or maybe she tries on makeup and looks through the medicine cabinet. I bet Giz stands at the foot of the bed as Vi sleeps, revelling in her new found freedom with a tootsie roll or cabbage patch dance.

I have a plan to capture the hamster tonight. I'm going to set up a box trap that the hamster will fall into by climbing up a staircase laden with more and more food on each step. The staircase will be made up of textbooks placed on top of each other high enough to reach the lip of the only opening of an 8.5" cardboard box. The bottom of the box will be lined with bedding and even more tantalizing food to ensure that the hamster stays safe and fed until tomorrow morning, when we hope to discover her in the box.

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